Quarterly stationery review

Pencil Paper Clash

Tiny pencils. Crumpled ammo. Absolutely no adult supervision.

No timesheets. No sensible decisions. Bring your own eraser.

Office handbook

How to cause stationery chaos

The basics

Move Aim until the ghost ball and circle cover your rival Hold to wind up, then release to throw Stand still beside your basket to collect five balls
Move joystick Aim until the ghost ball and circle cover your rival Hold to wind up, then release to throw Stand still beside your basket to collect five balls

WASDMoveStay on your own desk and use clutter as cover.

HoldAimThe transparent ball shows the landing point.

ReleaseThrowPut the whole target circle over the opponent.

Move joystickDrag the left stick in the direction you want your pencil to run.

AIM joystickDrag and hold to line up the ghost ball, then release your thumb to throw.

Win the desk dispute

  1. Recognise your pencil

    Your camera follows from behind. Your pencil has a wider, faceted eraser; with armour, look for the matching faceted helmet crest.

  2. Hit rivals

    Paper hits shrink them and grow you. Five hits knock a pencil out.

  3. Use desk cover

    Small pencils can hide behind books and office clutter.

  4. Choose a game mode

    Respawn returns you after eight seconds. Deathmatch gives each pencil one life.

  5. Mind your teammates

    A knocked-out pencil's final burst shrinks nearby teammates. Direct friendly fire is off.

  6. Refill at your basket

    Carry five balls. Stand still at your basket to reload.

  7. Earn faster refills

    Hits made while you are full size give reload credits.

  8. Shoot office contraband

    Hit a beacon to claim it: blue armour blocks two hits, green instantly refills, and red adds a bomb that damages every rival it catches.

  9. Stay on your desk

    You cannot cross the gap to the opposing team's desk.
Ko-fi

Keep the pencils caffeinated

Support Pencil Paper Clash through wavesfromtheloft on Ko-fi.

Buy me a coffee

Wall of questionable glory

Receipts from your finest stationery-related decisions, saved on this device.

This wall is painfully blank. Finish a timed match or Deathmatch and give it something to gossip about.

Career drawer

Lifetime totals kept on this device only, and the pencil skins they unlock.

Today’s challenges

Lifetime stats

Private desk report

Insights

This device only

No names, room codes or messages are stored. These anonymous totals never leave this device.

Pencil skins eraser, ferrule, crown and armour crest — team colours never change